TELEVISION REVIEW | Dr. Drew's rehab clinic makes for must-quit TV
January 10, 2008
BY DOUG ELFMAN Television Critic
So you think Brigitte Nielsen and Daniel Baldwin are freaks? At least they're functioning addicts.
You should get a load of little Jaimee Foxworth, who was Judy on "Family Matters." She grew up into a porn star with reefer madness. She smoked to the point where she refused to leave the house unless she could smoke ganja on the job. In the porn business, she could. Suddenly, meeting naked strangers on camera seemed like a pretty cool idea.
That sounds like one of those stupid public service announcements where the government tries to scare you away from silly little pot. And yet, Foxworth (no relation to Jeff Foxworthy) really went down that path.
"Celebrity Rehab" takes cameras into the Pasadena Recovery Center, where Dr. Drew Pinsky serves cold turkey to her and seven other "celebrities." (Jessica Sierra? Wasn't she just some "American Idol" reject?)
Pinsky is serious business, unlike egomaniacs who try to set up TV treatments of Britney Spears. So this seems like real rehab, even if some G-Listers come across as if they mostly want to mainline TV again.
"Why are you here?" Pinsky asks ex-famous wrestler and recovering binge-alcoholic Chyna.
"I don't know," she says after a lengthy pause of brain doodling. "Does that sound totally stupid?"
Yes.
If you're not used to seeing addicts go through withdrawal, watching "Rehab" could serve as a small shock.
Here's the lead singer of Crazy Town, Seth "Shifty" Binzer, pulling a crack pipe out of his sock: "This is probably why I'm gonna die."
And there's Jeff Conaway, in a wheelchair and looking unrecognizable from his vibrant roles as Bobby from "Taxi" and Kenickie from "Grease." He snorts drugs and does $1,000 worth of Xanax and OxyContin until he crashes hard off the dope: "Life is pain, and pain is hell."
Once all these losers sober up, they start getting cranky.
"Their brain feels like it's committing suicide when it's not doing drugs," Pinsky says.
It's all mildly interesting, what with the puking in toilets, the DT's and, oh, porn star Mary Carey trying to check into rehab with her sex toys, but apparently that's a breach of house rules. She passes gas loudly, too, then laughs like a hyena through a throat made of sandpaper and shards of glass.
If you're an addict, you should watch to see your awesome future as a skuzzy freakazoid suffering the depths of delirium tremens.
delfman@suntimes.com
BY DOUG ELFMAN Television Critic
So you think Brigitte Nielsen and Daniel Baldwin are freaks? At least they're functioning addicts.
You should get a load of little Jaimee Foxworth, who was Judy on "Family Matters." She grew up into a porn star with reefer madness. She smoked to the point where she refused to leave the house unless she could smoke ganja on the job. In the porn business, she could. Suddenly, meeting naked strangers on camera seemed like a pretty cool idea.
That sounds like one of those stupid public service announcements where the government tries to scare you away from silly little pot. And yet, Foxworth (no relation to Jeff Foxworthy) really went down that path.
"Celebrity Rehab" takes cameras into the Pasadena Recovery Center, where Dr. Drew Pinsky serves cold turkey to her and seven other "celebrities." (Jessica Sierra? Wasn't she just some "American Idol" reject?)
Pinsky is serious business, unlike egomaniacs who try to set up TV treatments of Britney Spears. So this seems like real rehab, even if some G-Listers come across as if they mostly want to mainline TV again.
"Why are you here?" Pinsky asks ex-famous wrestler and recovering binge-alcoholic Chyna.
"I don't know," she says after a lengthy pause of brain doodling. "Does that sound totally stupid?"
Yes.
If you're not used to seeing addicts go through withdrawal, watching "Rehab" could serve as a small shock.
Here's the lead singer of Crazy Town, Seth "Shifty" Binzer, pulling a crack pipe out of his sock: "This is probably why I'm gonna die."
And there's Jeff Conaway, in a wheelchair and looking unrecognizable from his vibrant roles as Bobby from "Taxi" and Kenickie from "Grease." He snorts drugs and does $1,000 worth of Xanax and OxyContin until he crashes hard off the dope: "Life is pain, and pain is hell."
Once all these losers sober up, they start getting cranky.
"Their brain feels like it's committing suicide when it's not doing drugs," Pinsky says.
It's all mildly interesting, what with the puking in toilets, the DT's and, oh, porn star Mary Carey trying to check into rehab with her sex toys, but apparently that's a breach of house rules. She passes gas loudly, too, then laughs like a hyena through a throat made of sandpaper and shards of glass.
If you're an addict, you should watch to see your awesome future as a skuzzy freakazoid suffering the depths of delirium tremens.
delfman@suntimes.com
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